I Think, I Heard and I Felt

There is aspecial meaning behind this record for me because it makes me think about my friend Deanne.  Sweet Dee who passed away a year ago next month.  I remember exchanging messages with her and her recommending this album to me. I fell in love.  For my seventy-fifth pick, I dedicate this to you Deanne.  I think about you a lot and I hope you are in a place where you're not suffering anymore.

Artist - Smog

Album - Knock Knock

Released - 1999

Label - Drag City/Domino

Genre - Folk Rock, Lo-Fi

Tracks:

Let's Move to the Country

Held

River Guard

No Dancing

Teenage Spaceship

Cold Blooded Old Times

Sweet Treat

Hit the Ground Running

I Could Drive Forever

Left Only With Love

I remember it like if it was a week or two ago.  I got on Facebook to check my daily messages and I see a post that mentioned something about Deanne not being with us anymore.  I thought it was a dream at first, but then when my friend sent me a text to confirm, I just started crying.  I just ran to the bathroom in tears.  The first thing I thought was, "Man, I hope she did not commit suicide," and of course that is exactly what happened.  She jumped off the St. John's bridge in Portland, Oregon on August 2, 2011.  Deanne had a four year old son named Lennon and when I heard about the cause of death, I immediately thought of him.  I mapped the bridge from her house and it was a little over a mile away, so she had time to think about it.  She just graduated with her Masters I believe and she just got a job at a hospital just a few days before.  After coming to terms with not being able to exchange messages with her or even Christmas cards, like we would do every year, I thought a lot about the realistic part of life and how things happen.  I know for a fact that life is short and I know that every time I have a depressing episode, I think how she is not here.  I think about her, my brother and my father.

And so, I dedicate this album to her.  A few years back I was looking for some new music and I think that Deanne was going through some emotional things in her life when she recommended Smog.  After listening to  Knock Knock in its entirety, I fell absolutely in love with I Could Drive Forever.  The best, in my opinion, song on this record, but to be honest, this is a great record.  Every time I listen to Smog, I will always be reminded of my friend.  A nice, caring, sweet, generous, loving friend.  I miss you!

Enjoy!